Parent to Parent: Pretend pals

You may not see them, but they are very real to five-year-old Anton: his imaginary friends, Kamal and Zaga.

At first, Anton's mom wasn't sure who her son was talking about, but it soon became clear.

Judith Matloff, Anton's Mom
"He would say, ‘Today I was playing soccer with Kamal,’ or he would tell me about how many languages Kamal spoke. And then the Zaga period. Could have been there at the same time, but I heard about Zaga later."

Anton is very specific about his pals. They sleep on the floor. They're both girls, at least on this day. Kamal is 9. Zaga is 4, and most importantly, only he sees them.

Doctors say imaginary friends are actually very common.

About 65 percent of kids will have one by the age of seven.

Dr. Christopher Lucas, child psychiatrist
"What the imaginary friend does is it allows them to work out things to communicate things and to be able to see other people's perspectives and emotions."

Although experts say pretend pals can help children emotionally, they point out it's important for your child to have plenty of real friends in addition to the imaginary ones.

Dr. Christopher Lucas, child psychiatrist
"Generally children acquire and lose imaginary friends the same the way they acquire and lose interest in a particular game or a book or an activity. So, it's going to come and go."

But in the meantime, doctors say parents should enjoy their child's fantasy life, but don't go to extremes -- treating the pretend pal as a real person.

Experts also warn don't let your kids pass on blame to their imaginary friends.

For example, they may say their pretend pal was the one who spilled a glass of milk.

Related link:
Children, Youth and Women's Health Services: Parenting and Child Health: Imaginary Friends

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